Tag Archives: Humor

Fibbing Friday – Catty-Corner

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Fibbing Friday – Catty-Corner

 

 

These are fun questions we’re supposed to answer in any kind of silly, wrong, or outrageous ways. Just for fun!

Find out more at the following link

https://pcguyiv.wordpress.com/2020/01/24/fibbing-friday-january-24th-2020/

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  1. Why did ancient Egyptians worship cats?

The old days Egyptians were wise. They knew that way in the future there would be a Las Vegas Casino called the Luxor & cats would still be revered.

This is my silver & blue Egyptian cat that came from the Luxor.

  1. Why is it said that cats have nine lives?

Because the cat came back, the very next day, and here’s a song about that.

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  1. Why are cats afraid of cucumbers?

Cats are afraid of cucumbers because they are long and green and remind them of a long green snake.

  1. Why do cat eyes seem to glow in the dark?

When a cat gazes at you with glowing eyes, you can be sure he’s sending you a ‘mind message’ … Feed me!

  1. Why do cats have retractable claws?

Because they are magicians, and they can go from soft and sweet to a frightening terror in seconds.

  1. Why do we train cats to use a litter box, but train dogs to go outside?

Dogs love to roam around outside sniffing stuff, whereas cats are big fans of boxes of all kinds.

  1. Why do cats purr?

Cats were bestowed the power of the purr to put a spell on people.

  1. Why are black cats considered bad luck?

Because they yowl at the moon and call in the werewolves on a full moon night.

  1. What is the musical, Cats about?

Probably about those yowling cats at midnight.

  1. What’s the big deal about Dick Whittington’s cat?

Never heard of him, but if he has a cat he’s probably okay.

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Thanks for visiting! Peace ☮️

© 2020 BS

Just Jot It January # 21 – Scraggly

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Just Jot It January # 21 – Scraggly

Daily Prompt – JusJoJan the 21st, 2020

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Today’s prompt word is brought to us by Cheryl. Thanks, Cheryl. 🙂

Your prompt for JusJoJan January 21st, 2020, is “scraggly.” Use the word “scraggly” any way you’d like. Have fun!

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Scraggly

irregular; uneven; jagged.
shaggy; ragged; unkempt.
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Fun, Funny, Clown, Silly, Party, Happy
Scraggly Baggly was a mess
The hair on his head grew less and less
His scraggly beard was sketchy and shaggy
The clothes he wore were woefully baggy
Yet still he had a grin on his face
With his teeth in no particular place
For his friends they urged at their behest
To straighten up – a reasonable request
And so in time with lots of work
Scraggly Baggly did not shirk
He turned into a handsome lad
Now all concerned were very glad
By combing his hair, and trimming his beard
It wasn’t as bad as he had feared
His teeth were straightened and shiny white
Now Scraggly looked and felt just right.
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~ cartoon photo from Pixabay ~
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Thanks for visiting! Peace ☮️
© 2020 BS

 

Fibbing Friday – Dog Daze

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Fibbing Friday – Dog Daze

 

These are fun questions we’re supposed to answer in any kind of silly, wrong, or outrageous ways. Just for fun!

Find out more at the following link

https://pensitivity101.wordpress.com/2020/01/17/fibbing-friday-17th-january-2020/

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In honor of Di’s puppy dog, Maggie, who is celebrating her 15th birthday today, we have questions about dogs!

Happy Birthday, Maggie! 🙂

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1. What’s the difference between a hair and a whisker?

Hair belongs on your head, and whiskers don’t belong anywhere.

2. How many spots were there in 101 Dalmations?

Probably too many to count, as none of the dogs were house broken.

3. What is the Flying Dog?

The Flying Dog is the name of a fast food joint that sells hot dogs. It’s a cousin to the Flying Burrito.

4. Why do we say ‘sick as a dog?’

Because it is a jump rope rhyme/chant. ‘Hot dog on a stick – makes you sick – how many hot dogs did you eat?’

5. What is meant by ‘going to the dogs’?

It means to get all dressed up for a fancy night out, similar to ‘putting on the dog’.

6. Who or what is ‘Goofy?’

Goofy is … what I become right before and after anesthesia.

7. Where is the Dog Star?

The Dog Star is on Hollywood sidewalk of stars – it’s for all the dog actors.

8. Where will you find puppies on a roll?

Puppies go rolling around in a beautiful green meadow. They chase butterflies & have a grand old time.

9. What are hush puppies?

Hush puppies are dogs that have been muzzled, to stop their barking or biting.

10. What is the hair of the dog?

Hair of the dog is what you find in the grooming brush.

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Thanks for visiting! Peace ☮️

© 2020 BS

 

Fibbing Friday – Nursery Rhymes

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Fibbing Friday – Nursery Rhymes 

 

These are fun questions we’re supposed to answer in any kind of silly, wrong, or outrageous ways. Just for fun!

Find out more at the following link:

https://pcguyiv.wordpress.com/2020/01/10/fibbing-friday-january-10th-2020/

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Look! We have a new photo for the challenge. Pretty cool – the word Truth has little word ‘lies’ in the letters, on a green, white, & red background. You can click the photo to see better. 🙂

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  1. How did the phrase, “That’s the last straw!” originate?

It was a contest held at a restaurant, and the person who took the last straw in the dispenser won a prize.

  1. What really grows in Contrary Mary’s garden?

Mary’s was a garden of good and evil – she grew roses – beautiful, yet dangerous and thorny.

  1. Though often depicted as such, Humpty Dumpty is never called an egg in the nursery rhyme. Who or what is he, really?

Humpty Dumpty was a Numpty raging about a wall. I think you know who I mean.

  1. How much wool did the black sheep have, and where did he get it?

The black sheep got all his yarn at the craft store – as much as he needed to finish a project.

  1. Why did the little lamb follow Mary everywhere she went?

The lamb followed Mary because she had tasty lamb kibbles in her pocket.

  1. What exactly is a tuffet?

A tuffet is a dish scrubber.

  1. What happened to the Knave of Hearts after he stole the Queen’s tarts?

The Knave got sick from eating the tarts because they were past their expiration date.

  1. What kind of pie was Little Jack Horner eating?

Little Jack Horner was having some of the King’s blackbird pie.

  1. Why did the girls cry when Georgie Porgie kissed them?

The girls cried foul when Georgie kissed them, because he had bad breath.

  1. What does the phrase, “Bob’s your uncle” mean?

It means someone is telling a lie, because I don’t have an uncle named Bob.

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Thanks for visiting! Peace ☮️

© 2020 BS

All Mixed Up – Fibbing Friday & Just Jot It January # 7

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All Mixed Up – Fibbing Friday & Just Jot It January # 7

These are fun questions we’re supposed to answer in any kind of silly, wrong, or outrageous ways. Just for fun!

Find out more at the following link:

https://pensitivity101.wordpress.com/2020/01/03/first-fibbing-friday-of-2020/

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Daily Prompt – JusJoJan the 7th, 2020 

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Your word of the day was selected by John at The Sound of One Hand Typing. Thanks, John!

Your prompt for JusJoJan January 7th, 2020, is “mix.” Use the word “mix” any way you’d like. Enjoy!

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And now for the mixed up questions and my silly answers:

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  1. It’s obvious what baked beans and baked potatoes are. But what is a baked Alaska?

Baked Alaska is the result of a topsy-turvy world climate, where Alaska is hot in the winter time instead of cold.

  1. What is a TLA?

A TLA is … an abbreviation for The Long Answer – but I’m only giving a ‘short’ answer here.

  1. What was boombangabang?

That’s the sound made when the wind up monkey boombangabangs his cymbols together.

  1. How would you describe a cornice?

A winning ear of corn at the agricultural fair. It was really nice looking.

  1. Who will be on the back of the new £20 note when it comes into circulation in February?

We don’t have those here, so I have no idea for real, but maybe a Corgi dog? They are so cute.

  1. Where will you be able to buy sky hooks?

Sky hooks can be bought on the ‘Cloud’. It is used to hook all your online doings into one place.

  1. If two’s company and three’s a crowd, what’s four?

This would make it a foursome for a golf game.

  1. Why are squares on a checkers board alternately black and white?

Trick question! They are black and red, and it’s because it’s the colors of our local University.

  1. What happens to all the holes cut out of ring doughnuts?

I eat them.

  1. Why did the rabbit go up the hole, round the tree (right to left) and back down the hole?

Because he got sucked in by a Google search – there’s no way to get out of the rabbit hole & it drives you crazy.

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Thanks for visiting! Peace ☮️

© 2020 BS

Calendar Daze

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Calendar Daze

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CALENDAR CRAZE (calendar days)

Here’s a re-post of one of my ‘Loco Letters’. I still go through this every year…maybe you do, too? 🙂

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LOCO LETTERS

It’s that time of year, again. The coming end of a year, when all the calendar companies come out with their new designs. I see them displayed in all the stores, from bookstores, discount stores, grocery stores, and even kiosks in the mall. Hundreds of calendars emblazoned with the numbers of the new year ahead. Here’s my loco letter to them…

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CALENDAR CRAZE (calendar daze) DSC00357 (2)

Dear Calendar Companies,

I love your calendars. Every one of them are bright, colorful, and oh, so helpful. I mean, how else would I know what the months and days are, if not for you.

The thing is, I have a problem. You may not think it is a big problem, and for you it isn’t. You can only benefit from my dilemma. You see, I like so many of your calendars, I have a really hard time choosing one to buy. I want them all.

I only need one, yet I wind up buying quite a few. It’s because the pictures of kitty cats, puppies, horses, and scenery are so pretty. Then, as I’m trying to choose, I see the trivia ones, then the joke-a-day ones, then the cartoon ones, then the ones based on all the television shows.

All of these come in different styles, too. The regular, hang on the wall types, in all sizes, the ones you put on a desk, and the small planner ones you can carry around. There is a calendar depicting every subject, and taste the buyer might want.

How are we supposed to choose? I stand there at the display, weighing one against another. Which one has the ‘prettiest flowers’, the ‘cutest cats’, the ‘funniest’ cartoons? It is impossible, I tell you.

Remember, I only need one, but in the end, I buy several. Then, at home, I try to find places to put them all…the kitchen, the bedroom, the office, the garage, the bathroom? (because, who doesn’t need to know when the next full moon occurs, while you’re -ahem- busy in there?)

All this calendar buying, I’ll admit, is good for your company, and I do enjoy looking/reading them. I suppose one way we can have an enjoyable experience in buying lots of them, is to give them as gifts to friends and family.

Then, what do you know…we can sit back and wait to receive more calendars…the ones they bought as a gift for us!

Sincerely,

In a Daze

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Here’s a calendar I got as a gift for Christmas. It is a calendar of cats that you fill in with sticker pieces like a paint by number, but with the little stickers, “Paint by Sticker Cats”. This will keep me busy all year. 🙂

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Thanks for visiting ! Peace ☮️

re-post © 2016 & 2019 BS

Fibbing Friday – Traditions

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Fibbing Friday – Traditions

These are fun questions we’re supposed to answer in any kind of silly, wrong, or outrageous ways. Just for fun!

Find out more at the following link:

https://pcguyiv.wordpress.com/2019/12/27/fibbing-friday-december-27th-2019/

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  1. Why was January chosen to be the first month of the year?  *** They drew names of the month out of a hat and January was the first one.

 

  1. Why does the Chinese New Year not start until February?  *** Because the celebrations are so elaborate for their New Year, that it takes a long time to plan and get it all in order.

 

  1. What’s the point of eating black-eyed peas on New Year’s Day?  *** Because that’s the only thing you have left remaining in your cabinet after the Christmas feasts.

 

  1. Why do we make New Year’s resolutions?  *** Because it’s fun to break the rules – and you know you will not keep these resolutions.

 

  1. What will Santa Claus be doing now that Christmas is over?  *** He’ll reluctantly climb up on his new exercise bicycle – Mrs. Claus insists.

 

  1. According to tradition, this is technically the 3rd day of Christmas. The 1st day is Christmas, itself. So what is the 12th day known as?  *** Forget about your resolutions day – traditionally.

 

  1. why are so many of the gifts listed in the song, The 12 Days of Christmas, birds?  *** Birds are fun!

 

  1. What earthly event marks when an angel gets its wings?  *** Whenever a person sees a bird, because birds have wings, too.

 

  1. What happens on the Winter Solstice?  *** You stay inside and play games like Solitaire.

 

  1. How did the tradition of the Yule log originate?  *** Years ago it was a fun craft project. Take an empty, round oatmeal box. Cover it with plaster of Paris goop, let dry and paint like a tree log. Add tiny bits of leaves and forest animal figurines. That was what we did.

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Thanks for visiting! Peace ☮️

© 2019 BS

 

 

Feline Friday – Happy New Year

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Feline Friday – Happy New Year

Feline Friday

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This is part of a new 2020 calendar (by Gary Patterson’s Cats), that I have for the new year.

Wishing everyone a Happy New Year!

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Tabby cat trying to avoid taking a bath in a wooden washtub

Orange cat being silly with party hats over both ears

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Thanks for visiting! Peace ☮️

© 2019 BS

Fibbing Friday – Confusing Christmas ??

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Fibbing Friday  – Confusing Christmas ??

These are fun questions we’re supposed to answer in any kind of silly, wrong, or outrageous ways. Just for fun!

Find out more at the following link:

https://pensitivity101.wordpress.com/2019/12/20/festive-fibbing-friday-20th-december/

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1. What do you get hanging from Santa’s roof? — frozen icicle toes

2. Where does Santa get his annual flu jab? — he gets it at the local supermarket

3. What kind of motor bike does Santa ride when he’s off duty? — no motor – just a banana seat bike

4. What does Santa suffer from if he gets stuck in a chimney? — hearing the kids keep asking ‘what’s that’ over and over

5. What do you get when you run over a skunk with Santa’s Sleigh? — a poor dead skunk

6. What do Santa’s little helpers learn at school? — how to paint stripes on candy canes

7. What goes Oh, Oh, Oh? — Santa’s replay sounds backwards in a secret message

8. Who is the King of Santa’s helpers? — his dog named King

9. What’s worse than Rudolph with a runny nose? — a hanging off the roof with frozen icicle toes

10. What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire? — Frosty Fangs

 

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Thanks for visiting! Peace ☮️

© 2019 BS

Christmas Memory # 13 – Christmas Chaos

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Christmas Memory # 13 – Christmas ChaosClick to view d

For the days up until Christmas I’ll be sharing some short memories of Christmases past that I remember.

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Christmas Chaos

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Here it is again, my re-posting of a poem I wrote back in 2006. If you’ve seen it before, wonderful! If it is new to you, hope you enjoy the humor in this one! 🙂

Red Letter Box for Letters to Santa

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CHRISTMAS CHAOS

‘Twas the week before Christmas, and all through the house

The paper was flying, the place was a mess.

Where’s the ribbon, where’s a box, where’s the tape, I don’t know –

And outside the window, it’s beginning to snow.

When I in my flurry, was running around, remembered “Oh-no, I have to go back to town!”

I have to mail packages, to those far away. How long will it take – a week or three days?

There’s munchies to buy, and a dinner to plan…and what, oh what, can I get for the “man”?

The pets all need feeding, and what could be more? The neighbors are here, with a knock at the door.

They come bringing cheese balls, and cookies galore.

I say thank you, then usher them out. Then I turn around and say with a shout, “I have to make gifts for those on our street!”

But, I’m about to collapse from the heat.

Get up and go, let’s do the day right. Put on some music, and candles to light.

A box of cards, my cup of coffee…should I eat that last piece of toffee?

Christmas ideas are really quite lofty, and really, at heart, I’m such a softie.

I’ll wrap a few gifts, then do some leg lifts; look at the snow – it’s now making drifts.

Put lots of presents in pretty paper, and think up some clues, for a Christmas caper.

Pull on some mittens, put on a scarf. If I hear one more carol, I’m going to barf.

I jump in the truck to go do my shopping; the stores are all crowded…the places are hopping.

On Target, and K-Mart, and Hastings, and Penny’s…Now United and Wal-Mart – can we stop at a Denny’s?

No – get it done – there’s no time to waste…I need to get home…hurry, hurry, make haste.

And then to the wondering eyes of those there, I manage to put some dye on my hair.

Some coffee, some milk, is all that I ask…to put my feet up, before my next task.

To watch my soap opera, would be a nice break. I think I’ll do that, and also eat cake.

I just settled down, and there goes the phone; I, of course don’t answer, I pretend I’m not home.

And now it’s time to do some more wrapping. We’ll put on some music – our feet will be tapping.

Merry Christmas to one, Merry Christmas to all…What’s that you say? Another trip to the mall?

I don’t think I want to…I don’t think I can…but, wait, I still need a gift for the ‘man’.

We must keep it even, we must keep it straight…I need another gift for my mate.

What shall it be, something big, or much smaller? As I walk the halls of the mall, I do holler.

I need to find a gift that is right – before I call it quits for the night.

So, I go to the mall, and the stores…and stand in long lines, before I get out the doors.

The aisles are all crowded, the cart’s in a jam…say “Excuse me, pardon me, excuse me, Ma’am.”

At first, we’re polite, when we go to town, but as frustration mounts, we’ll mow you down.

When there’s only one more shopping day…you better move fast, get outta my way.

Can’t find the right size, can’t find the right gift, then stop by the Starbucks to get a lift.

Give me caffeine right now, I say, got to get on with this frantic day.

Have a nice day, be jolly, be merry…if I hear it again, I’ll commit hara-kiri. It’s my ‘pleasure’ to serve you,

Uh-huh, yeah right…you probably make faces, as I pull out of sight.

Finally, finally get back home, where I just want to sit and moan.

My feet hurt, my back hurts, my nerves are all jangled…and how do you wrap a box that’s tri-angled?

Back at home, I start wrapping, all the critters are napping…

The oven is cooking the breads, how merry, but now I need another cranberry.

Merry Christmas to me…let’s trim the tree…and now the cats are OOC (out of control)

Happy to make your Christmas surprise, waiting for the bread to rise.

Christmas morning comes awfully early; no wonder everyone is so surly.

Buying spending – oh, what fun…we’ll all be glad when shopping is done.

The stockings are ready to hold all the goodies – maybe some candy or nice warm hoodies.

Light candles, fill stockings, with striped candy canes. Look out the window, hope it won’t rain.

Sweep the floor, wash the dishes, deck the halls with Christmas wishes.

There’s potatoes to mash, and take out the trash…as for me, I think I’m about to crash.

Finally, everything looks really pretty, Charlie (the tree) is ready, and still little bitty.

Now, take a picture, and go to our beds. I hope no one forgot to take their meds.

When morning comes, we’ll all get to say…we wouldn’t have it any other way.

Then, I look in the living-room, and what do I see? One of the cats is eating the tree. I holler and yell, but then, what does it

matter…I’ll just have to clean up the mess later.

She enjoys Christmas her way…I prefer mine…

So Merry Christmas to all…from our family to thine.

Just one more thing I’d like to say – Happy Holidays to all and Have a Wonderful Day!

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Coloring Book Page – brown squirrel on top of red & green package & wearing Santa hat

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First written on December 20, 2006

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Thanks for visiting! Peace ☮️

© 2014, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019 BS