Tag Archives: Humor

A Late Fibbing Friday 13th – Q & A

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A Late Fibbing Friday 13th  – Q & A

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These are fun questions we’re supposed to answer in any kind of silly, wrong, or outrageous ways. Just for fun!

The instructions you can find at the link below.

https://pensitivity101.wordpress.com/2019/09/13/fibbing-friday-13th-september-2019/

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These are the questions:

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If flower seeds give us flowers and tomato seeds give us tomatoes, what does bird seed give us?
2. How do you make a cat flap?
3. Why is Friday 13th considered unlucky?
4. When is the Witching Hour?
5. Are familiars always cats?
6. Where did McDonald’s originate?
7. What was the first thing Sleeping Beauty said when roused from sleep by her prince?
8. What’s the difference between a sink and a basin?
9. Why does the wind howl?
10. Why do we say swinging the lead?
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These are my silly and wrong answers:

  1. When you plant a bird seed, you will be surprised to see what hatches out. Bird seeds hold the DNA of pterodactyls.
  2. You make a cat flap by giving him dance lessons.
  3. Some say Friday 13th is unlucky, but it was a a good movie and made lots of money.
  4. The Witching Hour is when you take a forked switch from a tree and go divining water. It takes about an hour to find some. I’ve tried this and it works!
  5. Familiars aren’t always cats. Habits can be familiars, too. If you have a bad/good habit, you’re probably pretty familiar with it.
  6. Well, McDonald’s originated way back on the farm. He sang E I E I O, and presto, McDonald’s farm was on the map!
  7. Sleeping Beauty woke up to see Prince Charming and said – ‘Not now, honey”.
  8. A sink and a basin are different as night and day. A sink is a lizard, and a basin is a buffalo. Oh, wait – a skink is a sink?
  9. The wind howls because that is in it’s job description.
  10. Swinging the lead? Singing the lead? Leading the sing a long? England Swings? Lead the parade? Just guessing, you see. 🙂

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Thanks for visiting! Peace ☮️

© 2019 BS

Fibbing Friday Q & A

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Fibbing Friday Q & A

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These are fun questions we’re supposed to answer in any kind of silly, wrong, or outrageous ways. Just for fun!

The instructions you can find at the link below.

https://pcguyiv.wordpress.com/2019/09/06/fibbing-friday-september-6th-2019/

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The Questions:

  1. What’s at the core of a baseball?
  2. Why do leaves change color in autumn?
  3. Why are some superstitions called “old wive’s tales”?
  4. What is Labor Day all about?
  5. Why do schools traditionally stop classes during summer?
  6. Why is US football played in autumn?
  7. Why is the World Series championship awarded to the team that wins 4 out of 7 games rather than just which team wins 1 game?
  8. Why is football called soccer in the US?
  9. Why are bachelor degrees so named?
  10. Why are there no holidays in August?

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My silly answers:

  1. Since the baseball is a mini version of the world, the core/center holds the secret to why we are here in the world. When people hit the baseball, they are trying to split it open to find out the secret. So far no one has been able to split the ball open.
  2. Leaves change color in autumn because all the children in the summer time have spilled gallons of kool-aid on the ground around the trees. The trees soak up all the cherry red, and lemon yellow, and orange orange colors of the kool-aid, so their leaves turn pretty & sweet.
  3. Superstitions are called ‘old wives tales’ because they are old enough to think up silly things to scare people. Young wives are too busy with their new husband and maybe some kids, to sit around thinking up scary warnings.
  4. Labor Day is all about Yad Robal, which is a new computer language. It’s a fad that is sweeping the world.
  5. Schools stop classes in the summer time because everyone has to go hide from the migration of the cicadas.
  6. U S football is played in autumn because when those big football players crash into each other it usually smashes some cicadas, helping to get rid of them.
  7. You lost me on that question with all the numbers. Don’t know – don’t care.
  8. Football is called soccer in the US – huh? I get confused
  9. Bachelor degrees are called that because single men need a strong deoderant.
  10. There are no holidays in August because we call them vacations.

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Thanks for visiting! Peace ☮️

© 2019 BS

Fibbing Friday

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Fibbing Friday

https://pensitivity101.wordpress.com/2019/08/30/fibbing-friday-30th-august/

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I’m late as usual posting my responses to challenges. But this one is fun, so here it is on Monday! 🙂

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These are fun questions we’re supposed to answer in any kind of silly, wrong, or outrageous ways. Just for fun!

The instructions you can find at the above link.

The questions:

1. What are Porkies, Chorkies and Morkies?
2. Why did the Wicked Witch of the West melt?
3. Will Smith said ‘I’ve got to get me one of these’. What was he referring to?
4. Why aren’t dumb blondes quiet?
5. Why do they call it ‘High Tea?’
6. What makes a banana split?
7. What happened when the Princess kissed the frog for a second time?
8. What goes best on rhubarb?
9. How is the best way to serve coffee?
10. Why are rock buns so called?

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My silly answers:

  1. These are specialty sandwiches made of pork, chicken, and mutton.
  2. The wicked witch melted because it was 120 degrees in Kansas that day.
  3. Will Smith wanted one of those porkie, chorkie morkie sandwiches
  4. Dumb blondes aren’t quiet because they are dim bulbs and want to prove it
  5. They call it ‘high tea’ because in order to properly partake of the libation you have to perch upon a ladder.
  6. A banana splits because it wants to be a cheerleader.
  7. The 2nd time the Princess kissed the frog, she threw up because he had bug breath.
  8. Asparagus goes best on rhubarb, because red and green look like Christmas colors.
  9. The best way to serve coffee is to lob it over a net with a tennis racket.
  10. Rock buns are so called because the chef baked them too long and now they are stale.

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Thanks for visiting! Peace ☮️

© 2019 BS

Kammie’s Odd-Ball Challenge – Ivy & Aliens

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Kammie’s Odd-Ball Challenge – Ivy & Aliens 

https://nuthousecentral.wordpress.com/2019/08/23/kammies-oddball-challenge-8-22-19/#comments

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A nice display at the store of tall and lush climbing ivy plants.

And then … I saw the sign … “Ad Special/ 10” Pothos Ivy/Totem Ploe/32.99 🙂

Haha! What’s a PLOE? Probably meant to spell Pole!

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And this is just some alien stickers on our back storm door that my grand-son put there a couple of years ago. Still looks funny. 🙂

Gray wooden fence with two black birds on top/ three alien stickers on the clear glass makes it look like they are on the fence.

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Thanks for visiting! Peace ☮️

© 2019 BS

Fibbing Friday Q & A

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Fibbing Friday Q & A

https://pcguyiv.wordpress.com/2019/08/23/fibbing-friday-august-23rd-2019/

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These are fun questions we’re supposed to answer in any kind of silly, wrong, or outrageous ways. Just for fun!

The instructions you can find at the above link.

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Questions:

  1. Exactly who was the catcher in the rye?
  2. Where exactly does the red fern grow?
  3. To Kill a Mockingbird wasn’t about a trial. What was it about?
  4. If one does not simply walk into Mordor, exactly how is one supposed to get in?
  5. Why were they hunting for the Red October?
  6. What exactly was the clear and present danger?
  7. What was the black spot?
  8. The Lottery wasn’t about the pitfalls of blindly following tradition. What was it about?
  9. What kind of progress was the pilgrim making?
  10. Exactly who was the man in the iron mask?

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My Answers:

  1. Exactly who was the catcher in the rye? A bird called the scissor tail fly catcher – he hides in the rye and catches flies Tyrannus forficatus on branch.jpg
  2. Where exactly does the red fern grow? The red fern grows where the sun don’t shine.
  3. To Kill a Mockingbird wasn’t about a trial. What was it about? It’s a code phrase for a nasty computer virus.
  4. If one does not simply walk into Mordor, exactly how is one supposed to get in? Click your ruby slippers together 3 times, “let me in”.
  5. Why were they hunting for the Red October? Because red was trying to take over being the Halloween color instead of orange.
  6. What exactly was the clear and present danger? Clear fabric softener spilled on the floor – an accident waiting to happen.
  7. What was the black spot? The part of the toast that got burned.
  8. The Lottery wasn’t about the pitfalls of blindly following tradition. What was it about? A waitress who receives a $1,000 tip.
  9. What kind of progress was the pilgrim making? He finally learned how to sew buckles on his hat and shoes.
  10. Exactly who was the man in the iron mask? Hannible Lector.

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Thanks for visiting! Peace ☮️

© 2019 BS

 

One Liner Wednesday – What’s Going On?

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One Liner Wednesday – What’s Going On? 

One-Liner Wednesday – Hindsight

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Me: What’s going on with Word Press now? Everything is messed up!

Word Press: Says nothing, but keeps messing things up with no explanation!

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Thanks for visiting! Peace ☮️

© 2019 BS

How to Waste Time – Stream of Consciousness Saturday – Instructions

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How to Waste Time – Stream of Consciousness Saturday – Instructions

The Friday Reminder and Prompt for #SoCS July 13/19

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Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is “instructions.” Write instructions for anything you know how to do. As detailed or as rambling as you’d like. Enjoy!

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For today’s SOCS, Linda has given us the instructions to write about instructions. This will be interesting to see.

If you’d like to join in, just click the above link for details, and also to see more entries about instructions. 🙂

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I’m probably an expert in wasting time. I have plenty of time in a day, just like everyone does, but at the end of the day I’ve found I did nothing much.

If you’d like to know how to waste time too, here’s some instructions of the way I do that:

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Get up early

make coffee  & feed cat

play computer games while you are waking up

look outside – it’s still dark

heat up coffee that has gotten cold already

Look outside – it’s light out now

Count cats

go in another room

forget why you came in there

go back to original room

flip through a jillion tv channels for something good

don’t find anything good

look out window at the birds

count cats again

feed & water cats

talk to cats

decide to listen to that song that you can’t get out of your head

find it  – listen to it

listen to several more songs

decide you need to move around some, so do some living room dancing

try to get the cat involved – she just stares at you

make up silly words to song for the cat – she just stares at you, then goes to sleep

go get some iced tea

think of something to write on blog

now you’re hungry – go to kitchen – maybe you’ll get an idea

take a photo of what you found to eat

look at the hundreds of photos you already have

look at the time – half the day is gone already

get a text from somebody – answer it

this takes awhile, as the conversation goes back & forth

look at time

get more iced tea

count cats – aww they are so cute … look at them being cute

wait – one of the cats aren’t there

worry about where that cat is

watch birds eat cat food

watch cats watching the bird eating their cat food – and they don’t care

check the weather on TV or phone – look outside to see if it matches what the TV or phone says – it doesn’t

try to keep your eyes open, because you got up so early you now need a nap

play some computer games to stay awake

remember you’re supposed to be doing a blog post

look at time – it’s late – time for bed

next day – repeat all the above

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Thanks for visiting! Peace ☮️

© 2019 BS

Feline Friday – Toys & Tunes

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Feline Friday -Toys & Tunes

Feline Friday

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Feline Friday – Toys &  Tunes

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=^..^= meow

Happy Feline Friday!

These are a few of my grand-daughter’s stuffed cat toys.

  • Two orange tiger striped toy kitties with white faces
  • All white toy cat with blue eyes and pink ears
  • Gray and white toy cat – green eyes, and pink ears

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Just happened across this little video and thought it was pretty cute! This guy has a bunch of stuffed toy cats lined up and is pressing on their backs. When he does that they play a tune. I’m thinking the tune is “Somewhere Over the Rainbow”.  Pretty fun idea to do this, and sounds funny with the cats meowing the tune. 🙂

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Thanks for visiting! Peace ☮️

© 2019 BS

Little Devils

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Rabbit, Wild Rabbit, Red, Bunny, Animal

image from pixabay

Little Devils

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Here’s a short story I wrote way back in 2013, which pretty much no one saw.

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LITTLE DEVILS

They skittered away from me. They always do, the little devils. They are fast. I sometimes catch one, but it’s not easy.

Laughing at my attempts, they form little armies, who taunt me. I curse at them. I get angry, and stomp my feet, then find another weapon in my arsenal, hoping to one day find one that will annihilate them for good.

I’ve learned that they are tricksters. They have many hiding places, and love to skitter out at me…a surprise attack, only to disappear again. To look at them, you’d think they are innocent of any evil intent towards me. I know better, now. I’ve come to believe they have some kind of rudimentary intelligence that aids them in their mission…to drive me crazy.

The ones I’ve captured are disposed of immediately, but it hardly matters. Multiplication of their species is rapid, and they don’t mourn the loss of their comrades.

Where do they come from? How do they get in here? I don’t invite them in; I’d never do that. They are sneaky. If ever you look into the dark recesses of this place, you may catch sight of a few, caught congregating…formulating their plans. I shake my head, knowing they’ll be gone, if I run to get my chosen weapon.

They’ve been around for centuries…their kind. I’m sure of it. They are a primitive sort, yet hardy…impossible to completely wipe off the face of the Earth. I’ve dissected a few, those I’ve been lucky enough to catch. They made no sound, as I pulled and prodded them apart…even as they crumbled into nothingness. I was surprised. Their bodies seemed to disintegrate…a bit of hair, a bit of fluff…as I made sure they returned to the dirty little hell they came from. I shudder at the remembrance of it. I don’t pull them apart for curiosity’s sake, anymore.

I chased one the other day, though. It was skittering across the floor…a tiny one this time. From the corner of my eye, I caught a glimpse of movement. I was lucky, as I had my weapon already in my hand. I smashed the bloodless bugger flat. The only witnesses were the others of it’s kind…already trapped, and on their way to their doom.

Suddenly, I sensed a slight movement, behind me. Whirling around, I dangled my latest victim in front of them. “Hah! Look at your future, you devils,” I sneered. Flinging the deceased into their midst, I scooped up the whole lot of them, before they could react. Their execution was at hand.

As today’s invaders were being disposed of, I heard their final, collective thought…”We’ll be back…”

I sighed, shaking my head, and thought…“Waging war on those little devil dust bunnies is a never ending job.”

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Hope you enjoyed this bit of short fiction! Peace }I{

© 2013 BS

Flower Power Revisited – Flashback Post

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Flower Power Revisited – Flashback Post

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Fandango’s Friday Flashback — June 7

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Fandango asked for a flashback post from us, so this is what I posted back then on this day.

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FLOWER POWER?

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FLOWER POWER?

 

Scene: Busy Classroom

Characters: Tommy, the student, and a solar powered flower

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The teacher gave the students an assignment. They are quietly working at their desks. Tommy is looking around the room, thinking of something to write his essay about, and tapping his pencil on the desk.

Tap – Tap – Tap

FLOWER: Pssst, Tommy!

TOMMY: (looking toward the window sill) …Huh?

FLOWER: Don’t look so startled. It’s just me, the Flower. (nodding his flowery head) Yeah, I can talk.

TOMMY: (looks around the room to see if anyone is watching him) …But…how can you talk? You’re just a toy flower.

FLOWER: I’m a magic flower. Don’t worry about it.

TOMMY: What do you want?

FLOWER: I want you to write about me. You can make up some stuff, but make sure you mention I can only talk to you.

TOMMY: (smiling) Okay, but they won’t believe me. (starts writing on his paper)

FLOWER: (humming a little tune…waiting)

TOMMY: I’m finished writing. Can you read, too?

FLOWER: Nope, you will have to read it to me.

TOMMY: (reading) … Once upon a time there was a fake flower that could talk.

FLOWER: Fake? Fake? I’m as real as you are. Scratch that out.

TOMMY: Fine…(scratches through the word fake, then writes more words)

FLOWER: Well…are you done with my story?

TOMMY:  (writes ‘the end’ on his paper) …Okay, listen to this, Mr. Flower. “Once upon a time there was a toy flower that could talk to me, but only in this classroom. He was a pretty flower, but sorta weird. I think we’ll be friends forever.”

FLOWER: (smiling) I like it, Tommy! I think we’ll be friends forever, too.

TEACHER: (Looking over at Tommy) … “Tommy, stop your daydreaming, and get busy writing your paper. It has to be finished by the time the bell rings.”

TOMMY: (sighing) … “Yes ma’am.” (starts writing about a talking flower)

THE END

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Thanks for visiting! Peace }i{

© 2017 BS

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Thanks for visiting! Peace ☮️

© 2019 BS