My God what have I done?

This crushing grief, no relief

I don’t deserve relief…

You are gone.

My own hand has driven you to the unknown reaches

Why, O why…

I look back, as if I’m someone else, in my anger, in my hatred

Of myself

Taken out on you.

I’m sorry is not enough, can never be enough.

I know that, yet I say…no, beseech you to understand.

It wasn’t me, it was never supposed to come to this.

You, of all people should know how one can be

Possessed of evil.

Oh, what I’ve done

I’ve destroyed an angel…


Your bright and holy belief in the good

In everyone…in me

There’ll be no trust ever again.

I see your eyes in my dreams

Your disappointment, your vulnerable soul,

Tarnished by me.

Will I ever be able to look at the stars again,

Knowing they (you) are mocking me?

I dare not look up into that dark abyss that

Reflects no light upon me, now.

I’d rip out my heart and give it to you, to bring you

Back to life,

Into my life once more.

If  by chance you return by way of the flesh, or

Ethereal vision

I need you to believe me when I say how much I adore you,

Love you, miss you.

I am shamed.

The betrayal I caused, taking advantage of your love for me,

Your patience, your teaching me the way of your world, and

Yes, your other-worldly, joyful, countenance has

Brought me to my knees, to prostrate myself and beg.

Beg for forgiveness.


© 2016 BS


Written for dVerse Poets as a Persona Poem … a dramatic monologue.

Poetics: Persona Poem


Thanks for visiting! Peace }I{

23 responses »

  1. “…I dare not look up into that dark abyss….” Interesting line here….usually I think of looking down into an abyss………it works well here….as does your conversation within the poem. Well done.


    • Thank you, Lillian! The abyss…I’ve always thought it meant the deep sea, but the vast universe of the sky seems to be the same to me in the other direction … deep space. I’m really happy you enjoyed reading this one. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  2. I wondered if this tortured soul wasn’t lamenting his actions from behind prison doors. It seems he’s “destroyed” his beloved and is beseeching that she return “back to life.” I think he killed her. He may have to forgive himself…


    • Thank you, Victoria! What a nice thing to say, but really, not nor could ever be in the same league. Ahh, backstory 😉 thoughts from one of the fictional characters I write about.


  3. Very moving emotional and honest write ~ Thanks for sharing this with us ~

    And we would also appreciate it if you can visit, read and comment on the poems of your fellow poets ~ Have a wonderful week ~


    • Thank you so much, Grace! Happy you enjoyed it. … Oh, I do visit many on the links, and comment, when I can. Sometimes I have trouble getting it to go through. I’ll keep trying to make it work. – Hope your week has been a good one!


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s